Newlywed Games
by seeleyboothfan
Summary: Kurt never planned on getting married this way, not that they were actually married. Kurt never planned on being *pretend married* in this way. Kurt never planned on... Well, Kurt never planned on Blaine. Based off a book of the same name by Mary Davis. *ABANDONED*
1. Chapter 1

**I explain in Chapter 5, but I'll also explain here. I originally wrote out in detail the circumstances leading up to Kurt and Blaine being pretend married but it just wasn't working out. So, if you're just starting this, Chapters 1-4 are no longer the way the story plays out. You can read them if you want, but I've restarted the story at Chapter 5.**

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_How did we get to this point? _Kurt wondered as he gazed at the gold band on his finger. Blaine Anderson was still in the shower, humming some tune Kurt didn't recognize while Burt, his dad, slept in the room down the hall. Kurt glanced around Blaine's bedroom (_their bedroom_, Kurt amended) wondering the stories behind the pictures on the wall. He realized belatedly that they would have to take a few pictures together to put up around the apartment to make things more believable. Kurt glanced up when he heard a knock on the door. He'd told Blaine that he really shouldn't knock – it was supposed to be the bedroom of two married men, but Blaine insisted; he didn't want Kurt to feel uncomfortable, to which Kurt was secretly pleased. He really had picked the best man to be pretend married to. Not that he'd planned on being pretend married. He really hadn't planned on Blaine finding out about the pretend marriage and he _really_ hadn't planned on Blaine wanting to play along. As Blaine, his gorgeous pretend husband entered their bedroom, Kurt couldn't help but be transported back to the moment where it all began and relive the weird twists of fate that led them here.


	2. Chapter 2

**I've made of note of it in Chapter 3 (which will be posted in the next few days) - but please make sure to reread this chapter. I made a HUGE mistake in it and had to redo a lot of the dialogue. I stupidly put down that the doctor overheard about Kurt and Blaine's engagement. For the story to work, she had to overhear about their marriage. Burt has to think they're married, not that they're engaged, to make this story work.**

**I was so excited about this that I completely forgot the essential bits that make up the plot when I typed it. Other than that fact, everything else in this chapter is the same.**

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_How did it all start again? Oh, that right, Dad's heart attack. Third year of college, Dad had a heart attack that left him laid up for six days, each day getting weaker and weaker. I spent every waking minute in the hospital, doing everything I could to help him get better. I got quite close to his attending nurse, bantering back and forth when she'd come in to take his vitals._

"Hi, Shelly."

"Hello, Kurt. How are you doing today?" She looked up from where she was writing a few notes in Burt's chart. They were whispering; Burt sound asleep behind the curtain partition.

"I'm okay. I have way too much homework to catch up on."

"You know you don't have to be here the entire day. You should really go out and live your life."

"Okay, _Mom_," Kurt said with a mock scowl.

"Young man, are you giving me sass?"

Kurt smiled and continued sketching in his notepad. He sighed, and looked up at Shelly. "I wish there was something more that I could do for him. There has to be something that can kickstart him, I just wish I knew what."

"He mentioned the other day something about your boyfriend? Maybe if you guys were to get married, he'd have something to look forward to."

Kurt flushed. "Oh god, that." Kurt set down his sketches. "Can I tell you a secret that you must promise _never_ to tell my Dad?"

Shelly nodded, leaning in with an excited smile.

"It's a lie. I'm not dating anyone. Dad's been hounding me for years about how I must be so lonely and finally I snapped. I told him I was dating someone to get him off my back. He asks every once in a while so I've made up a story and it seems to work pretty good. It's lucky we live in different states, otherwise I'm sure he would have wanted to meet him."

"Wow. Well, I guess your marriage is out of the picture. Too bad, it's a great goal for Burt to look forward to. Hmmm, well, I'll keep thinking. You take care, Kurt." She patted him on the shoulder and set the clipboard on the edge of Burt's bed, making her way out of the room.

"Me married?" Kurt asked himself, shaking his head. "No one would be more shocked at that than me."

Kurt sighed again. He still was unsure if telling his Dad that he was dating someone was the best choice. He hated lying to him, but it was draining to always try and explain every single time they talked that _"No, Dad, I'm still not seeing anyone. No, I'm fine. I'm not lonely."_ His Dad had sounded so happy and it wasn't too difficult to make up a cute story for whenever his Dad asked what he and his boyfriend had been up to recently. He would try and think of a moment from a romantic comedy he'd seen and his Dad was usually none the wiser.

The problem was that he'd had to come up with a name and story for the person he was dating that first time he'd blurted out that he was not single anymore. He could remember the conversation like it was yesterday.

"_Kurt, I just am worried about you being alone out there in New York. If you could just find a nice guy to settle down with, maybe-"_

_Kurt had been quietly steaming as his Dad talked, already frustrated with his Dad's concerns about how much money Kurt's school was and how he should have a paying job instead of the current internship he had. "I'm not alone, Dad. I have a boyfriend." **Shit**. Kurt knew he'd made a mistake as soon as the words were out of his mouth. There was no good that could come out of pretending to be dating someone, but the damage was already done._

"_Oh, that's wonderful," Burt said, excitement in his voice. "What's his name? How'd you meet? What does he do?"_

_**Shit shit shit.** Kurt couldn't believe his stupidity. He debated a few seconds on whether he should tell the truth or not._

"_I just... all I've ever wanted was for you to have someone in your life the way I had your mom," Burt said. "I hate the thought of you not having someone to share all your moments with; someone to lean on."_

_That decided it. If it would make his Dad happy, he would do anything. Now, all he had to do was come up with a story that was both plausible and easy for Kurt to remember._

"_So, what's his name?" Burt prompted again._

_Put on the spot, Kurt said the first name that came to mind. "Blaine." He stopped himself from smacking himself upside the head. Of course he had to go and choose the one guy in his life that he both had the hugest crush on and had absolutely no chance with. "Blaine Anderson."_

"_How'd you two meet?"_

_Might as well be as honest in this lie as he could. "He's a photographer at Style, the place I'm an intern at."_

"_Well, I feel awful for trying to convince you to leave that place. If you had listened to me, you'd never have met the man of your dreams."_

"_I didn't say he was the man of my dreams."_

"_Ah, but to date The Kurt Hummel, he's got to be something pretty special. When are you going to be bringing him home for me to meet?"_

"_Dad, we haven't even been dating that long. Give me some time to keep winning him over before I let you terrify him."_

"_Fine, fine. I really do want to meet him one of these days."_

"_Bye, Dad."_

After that day, his Dad would inquire as to how Blaine and he were doing and Kurt would make up stories about how happy and in love they were, always making an excuse as to why they both couldn't come down to visit. He finally let his dad break him down and sent him a picture of Blaine. There'd been a day where he'd gotten the nerve to go up to Blaine and talk to him. He convinced him to take a picture together (_"I want to preserve my memories of this place. I'm taking pictures with everyone here._") and was able to send a picture of the two of them to his Dad.

He felt awful that he was using Blaine in this way, but there was no way he'd ever find out, so Kurt let it keep going on. He shook his head, flipping through his sketchpad. He heard rustling from the bed; he looked over to see his Dad waking up.

"Morning, Dad."

"Kurt," Burt rasped.

Kurt set down his pad and stood up, walking over to his Dad's bedside. "Feeling any better?"

At that moment, Burt's doctor came into the room. "Hello, boys. How are we doing today?"

Kurt turned to her. "I was just asking him that."

She smiled at him. "I overheard you and Shelly just now. Maybe Burt will start feeling better now that he has your husband to look forward to meeting."

Kurt's face paled. "I'm not-"

"Kurt? You and Blaine are married?" Burt's voice sounded stronger than it had been in a long time. He struggled to sit up, his face gaining color it had lost over the past few days in the hospital. "That's fantastic!"

"I'm – Blaine isn't-" Kurt spluttered.

Burt's doctor walked over to Kurt, pulling him aside. "Kurt, why don't you go grab Burt something to drink while I look over his chart."

Kurt looked at her with wide eyes before he nodded and made his way out of the room. He walked in a haze to the nurse's station, grabbing a new glass of ice water, and stumbling back to his Dad's room.

Dr. Leslie was just leaving the room and she paused at Kurt's side. "Sorry about that, Kurt. I saw your expression when I mentioned you being married; was it not-"

"I'm not married. I'm not even dating anyone."

Dr. Leslie looked horrified. "Oh god, I'm so sorry, I didn't..."

"I have to go in and tell him the truth. This lie has gone on too long."

Dr. Leslie put a hand on his arm, stopping him. "I have no right to tell you what to do, but you have to know something, Kurt. After Burt heard about your marriage, he improved almost 200 percent. His heart beat is steady and his lungs sound clearer. Maybe you should hold off on telling him the truth until he's fully recovered and out of the hospital."

Kurt just stared at her, wide eyed. What the hell had he gotten into?

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**I've been in the situation where people look at you with such pity when they find out you're _still_ single. I've been tempted to lie and say I have someone just to have them get off my back about finding someone. Poor Kurt lied in a moment of high stress and he let it get away from him.**

**Please let me know what you think about this. I'm really excited to get into how Blaine fits into all of this in the next few chapters.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Important information before you start reading this chapter. I thoroughly messed up Chapter 2 by mixing up a key plot point. Please go back and reread the chapter or at least read the new author's note. Thanks!**

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Burt wouldn't leave the subject of Blaine and Kurt's marriage alone. As soon as Kurt walked back into the room, his Dad bombarded him with questions. "So, my son is finally married," he said, ecstatic. "How come I had to find out from my doctor?"

Kurt frowned. He really hated lying to his Dad, but Dr. Leslie was right. He looked more alive now than he had ever looked before. "It was sort of a spur of the moment thing. We wanted something just for ourselves. I guess we weren't really thinking."

"Ah, being young and in love; I remember it all too well, Kurt. I won't lie, I am disappointed I wasn't at the wedding. I am really happy for you, though." He reached out and gripped Kurt's hand. "It's all I've ever wanted for you."

"I know, Dad."

His Dad proceeded to ask him about anything and everything since the last time they'd talked. He wanted to know details about the engagement, the wedding, where they were living, how it affected Kurt's school and job, etc. Kurt's story ended up being that Blaine had proposed a few months back at dinner one night and they got married a few weeks ago. They still hadn't really found a place for both of them, so they still had their own apartments for the time being. Kurt was still attending classes and the marriage hadn't affected his internship. Kurt didn't work directly for Blaine, so there was no conflict of interest. Burt had frowned when he heard they still weren't living together but Kurt assured him they were actively looking for a bigger place to live together.

Dr. Leslie came back in around that time. "Good news, Burt. If you keep improving this way, you'll get to be discharged in two days. If it works out for you, I'd like you to stay with someone for a week or two, to be safe. I don't want you to over exert yourself and I'd like to have someone there to keep an eye on you."

Burt turned to look at his son. "I always wanted to come see you in New York. This may just be the perfect opportunity, son."

Kurt's eyes widened. This just wouldn't do. There was no way his Dad could come live with him – he couldn't keep up this pretense of marriage when his Dad was right there in the same apartment.

"I think that would be a great idea," Dr. Leslie said with a smile.

Kurt bit his lip. This was turning into a disaster. How was he going to explain why Blaine never showed up? He could always make up some excuse – Fashion Week, maybe? His Dad would have no idea of the actual date of Fashion Week and it was plausible for one of New York's top photographers to be invited to the event. "Yeah, that sounds great, Dad."

"Are you sure it will be okay with Blaine? I'd hate to intrude."

"It'll be fine, Dad. Blaine will be out of the country for the next few weeks."

"He's leaving you alone so soon after your wedding?" Burt looked upset.

"It's part of the job, Dad. It's Fashion Week; that's a big deal for us."

"I guess that makes sense. It just isn't fair that I still don't get to meet him, especially now that he's my son in law."

"We'll figure something out. In the mean time, we should focus on you getting better so that you can come home."

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The rest of the time Burt spent in the hospital was fairly uneventful. Burt was intelligent in asking if Kurt could call Blaine so that could at least talk on the phone, but Kurt was quick on his feet and mentioned that, Blaine being in Paris, his cell phone wouldn't work. Plus, overseas calls were really expensive.

Finally, Burt was given the okay from Dr. Leslie to be discharged and Kurt and Burt couldn't be happier.

Kurt and Burt were waiting at the baggage claim in La Guardia when the thing Kurt had been hoping to avoid occurred. They were watching the bags go around the carousel when a gentleman walked up beside Kurt. He didn't pay him any mind until his Dad turned to greet the man and stopped short. "Blaine?" his Dad asked, shocked.

Kurt felt his face drain of color and he turned to face the one man in the entire world that he really didn't need to be here at this exact moment. Blaine turned to look at the two Hummels, raising an eyebrow in confusion. "Kurt?" he asked.

Burt stepped forward, sticking his hand out. "Hello, Blaine. I'm Burt Hummel, your father-in-law."

Blaine looked horribly confused, but god bless him, he didn't say anything. He simply held out his hand and shook Burt's hand. "Nice to meet you, sir."

"It would have been nicer if we'd met before the wedding, but Kurt here likes to keep me out of the loop."

Blaine gave Kurt a confused glance but smiled at Burt none-the-less. "Sorry about that, sir."

"I'd be pleased if you'd call me Dad. Or Burt, if you're not comfortable with that yet. Here's the odd thing – Kurt told me you were in Paris for Fashion Week."

Blaine narrowed his eyes, looking as if he was trying to solve a puzzle. "That's really odd – Fashion Week isn't for another month. Must have gotten the dates mixed up."

"So, you'll be around then. This is great. We can all get to know each other better."

"Right. If you don't mind, Burt, I'd like to talk to Kurt in private."

"Of course. You haven't seen each other in while, I know how that is."

Blaine nodded to Burt before grabbing Kurt's hand and pulling him around the corner and out of view of Kurt's Dad. "So, we're married?" Blaine asked with an eyebrow raised, and a tone of amusement. "Odd, I don't remember a wedding. I did get really drunk a few days ago, but I'm pretty sure my friend took me home, not to a wedding chapel."

Kurt colored, giving an embarrassed giggle. "Would you believe me that one little fib got _really _far away from me?"

"That must have been one hell of a fib."

Kurt sighed. "My Dad's doctor overheard a conversation I was having with someone and misunderstood. She came in and congratulated me on my marriage and it all snowballed from there."

"How exactly did I get pulled into this? And how did your Dad recognize me?"

Kurt paused. There really was no way he could get out of this with no embarrassment. "I can explain it all later. You can feel free to mock me all you want when you find out. Right now I just need you to leave so that I can take my Dad home."

"I can't leave without my bags. Besides, if we're married, aren't we living together?"

Kurt facepalmed. "I told him we had separate apartments. I'll come up with some story about your absence. Maybe you could go to LA for an event." Kurt sighed. "How did this all happen?"

"I wish I knew. Listen, Kurt. I had a really long flight and I'm anxious to get home. I'll play nice for your Dad while we wait for our bags and we'll come up with something."

"Thanks." Kurt shot him a relieved smile.

"I expect a full explanation at some point."

"Of course." They made their way back around the corner, Blaine grabbing Kurt's hand and twining their fingers together as they came back in view of Burt.

"I find it odd that we were all on the same flight and had no idea. You really don't keep good track of your husband, Kurt."

Blaine smiled and pressed a kiss to Kurt's temple. _He's really getting into the role, _Kurt thought, trying to hold back his giddy smile. "It was supposed to be a surprise. He didn't know I'd be back from my trip so soon."

"I want you boys to know that my being here doesn't mean anything has to change. You're still free to do whatever you two lovebirds want. Act as if I'm not here. I can wear earplugs if need be."

"_Dad_!" Kurt knew he looked like a tomato. He could hear Blaine chuckle from beside him. "If you must know, Blaine has another trip he has to go on. There's this event in LA-"

"-that isn't for another month." Blaine finished, turning to give Kurt a beaming smile. "Don't worry, babe, I have the next few weeks off to spend some time with you and your Dad."

Kurt felt his heart plummet into his toes. _What the hell was Blaine doing?_

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**I have no idea how I'd react if I was in Blaine's shoes but I'd say he's handling it remarkably well.**

**Please review!**


	4. Chapter 4

**So... I kind of sort of _really_ messed up the plot of this. Something wasn't feeling right about where I was in the current chapter, so I went back to the book and realized that I flubbed up the story enough that I don't know if I can fix it. Every time I try to make it work, it gets worse. I may just delete what I have and redo it or I may just try and rework it from where I left off or I may just scrap the story completely.**

**I apologize to those who were reading and following this - I really want to tell this story but I can't make it work because I've changed too much from the original.**

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**You'll see now that Chapter 5 is where the story actually starts.**


	5. Chapter 5

**Because I really worked hard on the first few chapters and because it did go a bit in depth about the beginning circumstances, I'm leaving the first few chapters of this up. In reality, this is the new start of the story. I hope writing the beginning parts this way makes the rest of the story work out. It really wasn't working the other way. Please let me know what you think!**

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_How did we get to this point? _Kurt wondered as he gazed at the gold band on his finger. Blaine Anderson was still in the shower, humming some tune Kurt didn't recognize while Burt, his dad, slept in the room down the hall. Kurt glanced around Blaine's bedroom (_their bedroom_, Kurt amended) wondering the stories behind the pictures on the wall. He realized belatedly that they would have to take a few pictures together to put up around the apartment to make things more believable. Kurt glanced up when he heard a knock on the door. He'd told Blaine that he really shouldn't knock – it was supposed to be the bedroom of two married men, but Blaine insisted; he didn't want Kurt to feel uncomfortable, to which Kurt was secretly pleased. He really had picked the best man to be pretend married to. Not that he'd planned on being pretend married. He really hadn't planned on Blaine finding out about the pretend marriage and he _really_ hadn't planned on Blaine wanting to play along. As Blaine, his gorgeous pretend husband entered their bedroom, Kurt couldn't help but be transported back to the moment where it all began and relive the weird twists of fate that led them here.

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_How did it all start again? Oh, that right, Dad's heart attack. Third year of college, Dad had a heart attack that left him laid up for six days, each day getting weaker and weaker. I spent every waking minute in the hospital, doing everything I could to help him get better. I got quite close to his attending nurse, Shelly, bantering back and forth when she'd come in to take his vitals. _

_Dad's doctor overheard Shelly and I talking about potential ways to help my Dad start to improve. Shelly had brought up the fact that my Dad mentioned wanting to see me married and I had to explain that the boyfriend my Dad kept referring to was an elaborate white lie I'd come up with to get my Dad off my back. Unfortunately for me, Dad's doctor only heard the part of our conversation where Shelly mentioned my marriage, so she came bursting in the room later that day to congratulate me on my wedding._

_Before I could correct her, Dad perked up and his vitals improved nearly 200 percent. Through encouragement from Dad's doctor, I realized I had to go along with this sham marriage to make sure my Dad kept getting better. I had to come up with yet another story about why I'd never told him about getting married. I'd already had this story going that Blaine, my faux boyfriend, was really busy with work and that's why he could never come to visit him with me. In reality, Blaine was a photographer that I had the hugest crush on at work. Blaine and I had spoken maybe three times in the year I'd been working at Style. When my Dad got suspicious, I did some creative editing on a company photo so that I could send him a picture of me and Blaine. _

_If I may, I'd like to explain why I created a fake boyfriend. I'm not pathetic, really, I'm not. I just got sick of Dad always hounding me about being alone and how he got worried about me. After the 50th time of explaining that 'I am taking care of myself just fine and no, I'm not lonely,' I snapped. I told him I had a boyfriend and that's when everything started going downhill. He asked me for a name and of course my brain went right to Blaine Anderson. How could it not? He's one of the most attractive and unattainable men in New York, so he was on my mind most of the time. I'd even had these fantasies at work that he'd actually look at me and be so impressed that he'd take me out to dinner right away... I'm still waiting on that to happen._

_Ok, back to my story. My new lie to explain my sudden wedding was that Blaine and I decided to get married right away so that my Dad could be confident in the fact that I had someone to take care of me while he was sick in the hospital. I promised that when he got better, Blaine and I would have a real ceremony that he and our family could attend._

_It turned out that Dad kept getting better and he was discharged to my care for the next month. I had to fly us both back to New York so that I could continue working. As luck would have it, Blaine Anderson was in that same airport and best of all, Dad spotted him. If you can't tell, I'm being really sarcastic right now._

_There we were at the baggage claim, surrounded by at least a thousand people and my Dad spots the one guy that I really didn't need to be there. He introduced himself, "I'm Burt Hummel, your father in law," to Blaine, whom looked thoroughly confused, but, gentleman he is, didn't laugh his head off. He simply stuck out his hand and returned my Dad's greeting._

_This is where a lot of that day blurs. Somehow, Blaine was clued into the fact that, in my father's eyes, he was my newly wedded husband and he was going to be coming home with us so that they could get to know each other. I'm sure Blaine must have thought my father had completely lost it or that I had completely lost it... that actually was quite close to the truth. By this point, I was losing my mind._

_For my part, I tried to get Blaine out of it. I mentioned that Blaine was quite busy with work, but my Dad just shushed me and Blaine, that bastard, just smiled and said that 'family is more important than work, dear," and wrapped his arm around me._

_When my Dad had to use the restroom, I turned to Blaine and frantically tried to explain the circumstances: I thought my Dad was dying, his only wish was to see me married, the whole misunderstanding about the wedding, and Dad's miraculous recovery. I was just about to explain why Blaine had ended up as my husband and why my Dad recognized him, when my father returned from the restroom._

_Blaine, conveniently, had taken a taxi to the airport originally, so he was all too happy to ride home with both my Dad and I. I hadn't quite come up with that part of the story of my all too happy marriage to Blaine. As soon as Dad got there, he'd realize I was living by myself. Explaining the fact that we lived in two different apartments was going to set him off, I was sure of it. The fact that I didn't have a wedding ring had already made him suspicious, but I'd explained that Blaine and I wanted to save up for real rings and were both okay with waiting._

_The closer we got to my home, the further down in the hole I could see myself getting. I was nearing the point of no return, Blaine being of no help to me. He could have easily just said he had a prior work engagement and I wouldn't be where I am right now. I guess he finds some amusement in seeing me losing my mind, digging myself deeper and deeper into a hole._

_We've almost caught up to the present. By the time we pulled up to my house, Blaine had nearly charmed the pants off my father. I really did hate that about him – how easily he won everyone over. He helped me unload our bags from the car and we made our way into my little apartment, both my Father and Blaine giving it a once over when we got inside. I was thankful that I'd cleaned before going to see my Dad._

_Now that we've reached the point where things got really interesting, I'll let you see for yourself exactly how it came to be that Blaine and I wear matching wedding bands and we share the same bedroom but we are **most definitely**__not married._


	6. Chapter 6

**So I'm abandoning this story for the time being. If I get inspired, I'll probably scrap this all and start anew. **

**I'm so sorry for those who were enjoying this but... ugh I hate this story so much now because it's not working.**

**If you liked it, pick up "Newlywed Games" by Mary Davis and read it - it's a good story. It has the element of religion that I despise, but if you can get over that, it's great. I think it would work well for Kurt and Blaine if I was just talented enough to do it. But I'm not, so I'm scrapping it.**

**If someone else wants to write it, go right ahead, I'd love to read it.**

**In the mean time I'll rewatch AVPSY for the millionth time and listen to Against All Odds and cry over all the feels.**


	7. Chapter 7

Update on this story:

the-power-of-love and Sofia Michelle both contacted me and asked if they could rewrite this story. I gave my approval to both of them. Once they start posting it, I'll put the link here so that everyone can find it.


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